HOW TO AVOID CATCHING “THE FEELS” WITH YOUR FUCK BUDDY?
Casual relationships can be rewarding and fulfilling. Sharing an intimate moment with a someone new can teach you a lot about your own desires and sexualities, as well as educate you on the important lesson of collaboration.
Sex is an alliance between both individuals, a joint effort to reap all of the physical and mental benefits that come from cumming. With no-strings-attached sex, you get all of the positives without any drama, IF, and only if, you both can avoid the pitfall of developing romantic feelings.
If you’re having trouble finding someone who is DTF, try joining a dating site specialized in bringing people together for casual sexual encounters, such as Victoria Milan.
No-strings-attached sex is great if you are turned on but too busy for a relationship. As long as you and your date are on the same page, all is well. Here is our best advice on how to have your cake and eat it too.
1) Only start if you’re sure you don’t want to date.
The easiest way to fall prey to feelings with someone you’re sleeping with is by wanting them from the start.
If you’re only saying you want “something casual” because no one will date you or the people who will aren’t satisfying you, you are bound to start feeling some type of way after flirting with and fucking someone.
A good fuck buddy is someone who genuinely can’t see fitting a boyfriend or girlfriend in their life. He or she is horny as hell and looking to have a good time in the small amount of free time they have available.
2) Define your boundaries.
Both in the relationship and in bed, you need to be clear what you’re looking for. Your profile page can be a huge asset here, as a lot of the time you can put that information out there that one time and then future matches will often check out your information before chatting.
Be sure you’re looking for the same type of arrangement. Discuss the frequency of encounters, protocol for the “booty call”, and even the pace of the encounter itself. Cover all your bases now and it saves an awkward encounter later.
If applicable, make it clear that you’re dating more than one person. It’s just a common courtesy.
3) Don’t cuddle.
If it involves touching and isn’t actively leading to try and seduce your fuck buddy, stop. If you’ve already had sex and you’re not looking for round two, don’t do it. If it is at all cutesy or PG, it does not belong in your bedroom!
Despite you both having the best of intentions to just make it about the sex, it’s a fact that orgasming and physical contact both release hormones known to bond couples together. To combat this natural fact, you must plan for this by laying down some ground rules.
It could be no sleep overs, no cuddling, no kissing. Whatever tends to make you go gaga with a girlfriend or boyfriend, avoid doing it with your fuck buddy entirely. Set rules from the very start and take your rules seriously.
4) Keep talk casual.
Even when you’re discussing your lives outside of the bedroom, keep the conversations short. If you need to ask advice, go to a friend. If you need someone to console you, call your best friend to you down until you’re ready for some sexual healing.
Keep your conversations short and lighthearted, unless you’re getting hot and heavy with dirty talk. If you don’t get too involved emotionally, there is no room to develop romantic feelings.
That’s not to say not to talk to your FWB, because language is an important part of foreplay and building sexual tension. Draw the line when you start wanting to talk more and fuck less.
5) Limit yourself.
If you believe that there can be too much of a good thing, you’d be right. Part of the thrill of sleeping with someone new is not knowing what to expect from them. Once you’ve gotten to know someone, it is only inevitable that your sexual excitement for them will wane with time.
To save a hot arrangement from going stale, it’s best to reserve great fuck buddies for later, only hitting them up for the bi-monthly or monthly booty call. If things become too routine, you risk losing your passion or growing feelings for them.
6) Don’t invite her to hang out with your friends.
Sure, this doesn’t sound like a big deal now, but when the two of you are several drinks in and everyone in the house you’re in is calling you a couple, you might start to feel differently.
Not only will your friends be questioning the status of your “relationship” all night, but it also gives them a chance to like your FWB and start bringing this person up at other gatherings.
Just like spending too much time with someone can invite romantic feelings, so can thinking about a person too much. Especially when your friends are all saying “When are you going to ask her to be your girlfriend”?
7) Only text for sex.
Don’t hit your fuck buddy up to wish them happy holiday or ask how their recent interview went - you shouldn’t even know about it, honestly. Contact your fuck buddy for logistics only.
Sexting or booty call requests only! Anything else is a little too friendly for your sex-only friend.
If you are having trouble adhering to this rule, you might have already crossed the threshold and developed feelings. Talking to a person a lot means they must be on your mind a lot, which is a slippery slope to be on.
8) Have other “Buddies”.
Of course you don’t have to share the love, but this is a great way to avoid actually falling in love. Since you’ve got a busy schedule, you won’t have time to spend “too much” time with anyone.
Not only will this help prevent you from developing feelings while adult dating, it will send all the right signals to your fuck buddy to keep them on the straight and narrow as well.
9) Don’t keep their stuff.
One thing almost every typical couple does when dating is showering each other in small gifts and trinkets of their affection. It isn’t always even a gift, it could be a guy leaving a girls favorite sweater of his “by accident”.
These seemingly innocent items can lay around your house like landmines causing you to keep thinking about this person over and over. Even someone who wouldn’t describe themselves as sentimental can fall prey to the power of things.
10) Be adult enough to call it quits.
Everything has an ending, and if or when you inevitably do end up falling for your fuck buddy this could very well be the reason for it. It only makes sense, when hormones that bond people are released from the whole interaction.
If this happens, or even if you are not into the sex anymore, end it. Tell them you don’t want to be their booty call that evening, and that’s all you really have to say. There is no reason to waste their time or yours.
Although it’s impossible to control something so organic 100% of the time, there are proven methods that can reduce the potential for feelings to grow when engaging in casual sex.
Now that you have the methods to help protect you from the dreaded “feels”, you can log onto your account on Victoria Milan and begin browsing over 6 million profiles of sex positive adults seeking a good time.