Metro vs. Masculine - What Do Women Really Prefer?
Dating can be daunting for men and women alike.
Societal views of both genders, and the expectations we hold of each, have evolved considerably in the past fifty years or so. Today, men are encouraged to be more sensitive, more fashionable, and (dare we say it) more feminine.
Many women, meanwhile, continue to distance themselves from long-held expectations: that they should wear make-up; that they should wear certain types of clothing; and that they should be the ‘pursued’ in relationships, rather than the ‘pursuer’.
Of course, cultural acceptance of transgender issues has shifted incredibly, though there is undoubtedly still some way to go.
What does all this mean? Knowing how to present yourself, and how to behave, to attract potential mates is a little more complicated than it used to be.
Thankfully, online dating has helped to even the playing field. Being able to use websites that allow you to tailor your searches make finding your ideal partner far simpler than previous generations may have imagined possible. Yet you still have to know who you are, and how to sell yourself.
As a man in the dating game, knowing what potential partners actually want in today’s world may seem a tad overwhelming. Metro or masculine? Fashionable or rugged? Clean-shaven or bearded?
Let’s look a little deeper.
The Science of Desire
As with many subjects, scientific and sociological research sheds light on the murkiness of the ‘ideal man’.
One study revealed that women leaned towards more traditionally-masculine men in countries with lower life-expectancies and overall poorer health. Around 4,500 women across 30 nations were shown images of various men, and asked to choose the most desirable males.
As the importance of a stronger constitution and physical resistance against disease grew, so did the participants’ preference for ‘hunky’ men. However, while this indicated these males would be a suitable mate and provider (at a subconscious level), the research also indicated that women tend to connect antisocial tendencies to more ‘masculine’ men.
This put the traditionally strong man in an awkward position: physically desirable, certainly, but not necessarily the best choice to raise children after fathering them.
Grooming and Sexuality
Another study revealed that women found men with a light coating of stubble on their jaws attractive as short- and long-term mates, while those with full beards were regarded as more aggressive. Beards were also shown to be an indicator of older age and social-maturity.
As a result, the research found that stubble indicated a man would be a more exciting, satisfying sexual-lover, while those males sporting a beard would have a stronger interest in raising their children.
Should metrosexuals ditch their beard-trimmers and stop plucking their eyebrows, then?
Research conducted using a popular mobile-dating app revealed that metrosexual men received more positive attention than four other types (241 matches, with women around the age of 23).
The ‘lad’, the ‘hipster’, the ‘rocker’, and the ‘gym buff’ were all less-popular than the metrosexual male. Why?
One expert suggested that while spending more time in the bathroom than the woman in the relationship might be a negative factor, their attention to detail indicated they may be an attentive partner.
“If you take pride in your appearance and value setting off to prestigious places to eat, drink, and spend your holidays, you’ll be a perfect fit,” said Caroline Brealey, a relationship expert.
What Does All This Mean?
All in all, this is somewhat confusing.
Some women questioned in surveys clearly connected men with more ‘masculine’ traits as genetically attractive, especially to breed strong children and provide, but viewed them as less-reliable. Others, meanwhile, thought those with beards stood a better chance of raising children well.
Meanwhile, some women believe a vain, metrosexual man to be a more attentive partner.
Confused? Well, don’t be.
What this really says is that tastes and perspectives differ – which we all knew anyway. What one woman sees as an ideal look or characteristic, another will find a major turn-off.
When dating online, the important thing is to be yourself – literally and figuratively. Don’t use a picture of yourself from 10 years ago, showing you as you were. Don’t invent hobbies for yourself to interest certain women or create a false history to appear more experienced.
Be honest about yourself and who you are. As they say, there’s someone out there for everyone – and you may be surprised by the sheer number of potential mates who find you irresistible.
At Victoria Milan, we’re dedicated to helping people in marriages and committed relationships find their ideal partner for extra-marital passion. You can find the perfect man or woman you dream of, and rediscover the thrills you may not get with your long-term partner.
Remember: be yourself – whether you’re a well-heeled metrosexual or not.