The Victoria Milan Guide to Online Sexual Slang

The term ‘Netflix and chill’ has become incredibly popular in the past year. Like much internet slang, this is creative, witty, and true: it applies, of course, to the act of going to a lover’s home for sex while Netflix plays in the background.

Still, there’s a lot of inventive sexual slang out there in the online world. To help you stay abreast of the latest must-use terms, perhaps to avoid potentially-embarrassing situations, we’ve compiled a selection of the best examples. You may encounter some or all of these in online discussions, especially when discussing matters of an adult nature.

ABC Sex

This applies to sex only occurring on Anniversaries, Birthdays, and Christmas.

Sadly, many an unhappily-married person may well be familiar with this concept. ABC sex is usually indicative of an extremely stale relationship, though in some cases, one or both partners may be happy with this arrangement.

If just one person in a marriage or committed relationship has no sex drive but the other does, ABC sex may well lead to an affair; passion simply cannot be stifled forever.

Dogging

Must not be confused with doggy. Whilst doggy might be something painfully regular by now, dogging is a bit more of a public display of passion. Dogging simply explains the action of having sex in public parks whilst people are watching. Simple.

Bucking Bronco

Grab your lady by the breasts in a direct fashion and hold on firmly. Bend down and whisper something so revolting or shocking into her ear that she will try and buck away from you. Some suggestions to get you started:

• I have aids

• I killed the last woman I slept with

• I have been watching you your whole life

Something rather charming like this should do the trick!

Sexercism

This term actually has multiple possible definitions, though the most common usage is in relation to having sex with a new partner to help yourself get over an ex. For many people, one-night stands are the key form of sexercism, and multiple casual flings may be needed to banish the lingering connection you might feel towards a former-significant other.

Another definition of sexercism relates to sleeping with an individual who might have been acting out of character or in a grouchy manner, in which case sex may restore their good cheer. A discrete hookup could well lead to a sexercism for people with pent-up frustrations.

Not to be confused with ‘sexorcism’, which is something else entirely.

Growlers

The wonderful and classic culture of Great Britain gives you this tasteful label of a females untrimmed privates. Even though, you might argue, such classic words might be of a rare commodity and this might not be the filthiest… Let’s include some of the ruder options out there;

Gorilla Salad

A grotesquely hairy vagina. This is not top five positive nicknames.

Snatchural

With a specific resemblance to the image of a woman’s untrimmed bikini line in the 60s.

Drooling Buffalo

An aroused female vagina with extremely untrimmed muff.

Bearded Kebab

A bearded kebab is simply a very hairy vagina. Kebab I guess is chosen because of its pastry?

Bearded Clam

A bit like bearded kebab, just another version for a different mood.

Nasty Chubaka

A woman of French decent which has not yet learned to shave.

Bushpack

A good old bushpack is so covered there is no telling what is under there.

Vertical Bacon Sandwich

This is a more complicated version of the bearded kebab and clam.

Twatasaurus Rex

A very large and scary vagina. With ancient shaving habits.

Whisker Ditch

A ditch you fall into which happens to have long whisker-like pubic hair.

Jungle Crotch

A very huge and extremely hairy vagina. Anyone – ANYONE would get lost in there.

Whisker Biscuit

The biscuit refers to the female genitalia and the whiskers are names for its grotesquely long and hard hairs.

Furry Meat Pocket

All these food-related slang pretty much just feeds man’s love for his favourite two things.

Sushi Jungle

Also an extremely hairy, gigantic vagina, this time of an Asian origin.

Fur Saddle

Although somewhat related to the previous slot, this one deserve its own description, at least. Because this one is specific down to the last string of hair. Fur saddle is pubic hair which continues the mysterious path from the navel to the bum crack in one proud strip saddle.

Furrbie

This has basically turned into a movement with religion-like hype from ever-so-odd cultures. The peculiar action of sleeping with someone in an animal or mascot costume has awoken our interest in the weird and unaccepted by most. Maybe some unresolved issues from childhood are involved, but we all have those so can’t judge.

Unicorn

Unicorn is obviously not a sexual slang. Oh but, you say? It is? OK, let’s sexualize every part of childhood imagination. Unicorn in this context is a mythical creature for a couple, specifically. They appear to sexually please the man and the woman without receiving anything in return. The couple can be free to enjoy the view of the other or get lost in their own experience.

Netflix and Chill

Netflix and Chill is a term derived from the simple act of watching Netflix whilst chilling. Like so many other internet slang, the term changed in meaning from a direct and innocent act, to something of a stronger sexual nature.

Today, if you ever hear your child’s plan being to “Netflix and Chill” then you know they mean get dirty with no intention of hiding it – and at the same time, express it to you directly and laugh at your ignorance. Well – NO MORE, let our urban dictionary set you free!!

If you think about it, it really is a modernized way of saying: Want to come over and watch a movie? ;)

Twitter Bang

Also derived from a social attribute we can look back on in time and be proud of to have taken part in. If you Twitter Bang someone you have managed to get down and dirty without having conversed more than 140 words with them. We truly lead the way for future generations with this one!

Heteroflexible

This one however, is a perfect example of tolerance becoming part of social culture and language. Heteroflexible means you are hetero. Sometimes. Now and then. I guess it’s a definition to escape definition in itself and therefore marking itself as a bit of an oxymoron? But that’s just an afterthought!

Masternap

When taking a masternap you are tired for a very specific reason – masturbating too much. I don’t know if this one applies to younger generations or all, but it definitely doesn’t sound like something too unfamiliar from younger days, and yet is still an occasional happening today. Talking about personal experiences that is.

Dick Sand

OK; you got to love this one! The meaning is painfully obvious, but let me walk you through it anyway. If your girlfriend loves dick so much that she gets totally lost in it, if your friend changes behaviour every time she tries a new partner because she loses her head in his privates, then she gets lost in Dick Sand. Yeah…… I know!

Some-sex Marriage

Not totally unlike ‘ABC Sex’, some-sex marriage refers to a wedded couple who have sex only intermittently. They may not even engage in intercourse on Anniversaries, Birthdays, or Christmases either, perhaps preferring to try sex only on the rarest of occasions. Sex may even be used as a manipulative tool, in exchange for performing household chores or taken away as punishment.

For anyone with a sex drive and a yearning for physical satisfaction, being stranded in a some-sex marriage may well take a severe toll on your life. Finding exciting, passionate lovers to satiate your hunger allows you to focus on the emotional joys of your marriage without sex being a burden.

Booty Grazing

This is something a lot of us may have encountered at one point or another: the sending of a generic message to anyone you would consider having sex with in your contact book. This is usually an act of desperation, or an attempt to find a lover with a minimum of effort.

Of course, resorting to booty grazing may well cause friction in friendships, or make you appear desperate.

Kino

This applies to making flirtatious gestures towards a person you find sexually appealing, such as touching them briefly or dancing against them. This is a common part of dating or hunting for a partner in a social environment, such as a club or a bar.

Santorum

Santorum is the delicious blend of faecal matter, lubricant and come which is in the action of leaking out of your partner’s anus after a round of back to front. Santorum happens to be named after a popular gay-movement activist Rick Santorum.

Have you encountered any of these terms before? If not, we hope this guide will help you keep up-to-date. At Victoria Milan, we’re dedicated to giving you access to an unparalleled portfolio of married and attached adults for discrete hookups – anonymous, secure, and safe. Your perfect lover is out there – trust us to help you find them.