How to Master the Open Marriage?
Mutual Understanding is the First Step.
Marriage (noun) Any forms of interpersonal union established in a familial bond that is recognized legally, religiously, or socially, granting the participating partners mutual conjugal rights and responsibilities.
Marriage is an enduring human concept that has been dug up by anthropologists all over the planet. The definition of marriage, what it should include, and what it should definitely exclude, is something that has been debated throughout history, and has it has grown into quite a hot topic in the modern world too.
Open Marriage (noun) A marriage in which the partners agree that each is free to have sexual relationships with other partners.
Open marriage is one of the very things that has inspired much debate. Its fans claim it is how things were meant to be, and avoids the alternative of eventually growing bored. The critics, who have been often come from the church or legislation, are often concerned that the very definition opposes marriage itself. They are afraid that their spouse will look away and never look back.
Delving in deeper, an Open Marriage is a marriage in which each spouse knows and approves of physical relations outside of the bounds of the relationship. In other words, they’re open to a little extra. Marriage plus.
The only constant when it comes to marriage, open or not, is that there’s a legally binding contract, so whatever is allowed by law can be considered a marriage, and with that definition, marriage will always be changing. An open marriage, on the other hand, is always the legally married couple in a committed relationship, and then one or more sexual flings on the side.
This differs entirely from adultery because your spouse not only aware of your intermarital sex, but is okay with it. Not only does it not offend him or her, they might even go as far as being turned on by the fact that they know you just got some extra on the side.
It can also easily be distinguished from polyamorous relationships because the married couple is not dating or romantically involved with the “others”. The couple has sex outside of the relationship, but nothing else. While the sex affair may be long lasting, it is not a long term relationship.
The couple isn’t relying on their lovers for support, comforting, companionship, or anything in between. In fact, Open Marriages are also known as “consensual non-monogamy”, a committed and stable relationship, but not sexually monogamous.
The different terms for Open Marriage may be new to the nightly news segment, but the concept is nothing new. With a network of adult members approaching 7 million worldwide, Victoria Milan is the fastest growing adult dating network available, making it the best site to join if you and your spouse seek alternative, adult fun.
What about Divorce or Not Marrying?
No matter what you do, you can’t get the curves and angles of that one person’s body out of your mind. The way they touch their lip or cross their leg. It is your body’s release of dopamine that initially caused you to enjoy your time so much with your spouse, and it’s the same thing attracting you to all the others, now.
Despite all the best efforts, the initial sexual desire for a partner eventually leaves, and not just with humans. Almost all mammals and even several species of snakes have been shown growing tired of their mate to the point where sex stops and even erectile dysfunction occurs.
In all of those species, when they presented males with their “new female”, all mental and even physical issues preventing sex with their mate seemed to vanish that very moment, and sexual inspiration struck.
Don’t get too big of a head, ladies. Women of most of these species also showed the same apparent boredom for men they had already had sex with and prefered the unknown males. Numbers don’t lie, and we have about equal numbers of femal members on Victoria Milan looking for some fun.
Monogamous relationships aren’t all bad, but they certainly aren’t for everyone. It is easily arguable that the “natural” way to date is by shacking up with more than one mate and settling with one main. This is, afterall, the most typical scenario in the animal kingdom.
Not only does it feel natural for many couples worldwide, it isn’t about a lack of love or commitment to their partner. Openly Married individuals are wanting to pursue a new activity that they can share and bond over with their spouse.
Can You Cheat in an Open Marriage?
At the end of the day, your spouse has your heart and your future is with them. You might be gung-ho to let your freak flag fly, but if your partner is less than enthusiastic, you need to dial things back a bit.
An open marriage is an agreement to allow each other to be with other people, but at any time either one of you could realise this isn’t for you and rescind the permission. Continuing to engage in casual sex after your partner has put on the breaks is cheating.
Alternatively, even if your partner is still okay with the side sex, breaching your particular agreement and rules you came up with is also crossing a line. If you don’t know if it is going too far, talk to your spouse.
Allow each other to make mistakes, but also to learn from them. Don’t completely condemn your significant other for slipping up, this is uncharted territory for the both of you and they just might not be as adept to change.
Types of Open Marriages
The limits are boundless, but these are some of the most common types of Open Marriages that you are likely to hear about. Any sexual encounter could include more than one of these scenarios or all at once.
This is what would be considered your basic Open Marriage scenario, simply describing one or both of the married couple having sex with one or more lovers outside of the marriage.
The married couple incorporate one or more individuals into their sex.
One of the married couple has sex with someone outside of the marriage as the other watches. They don’t have to join, but sometimes can be invited to participate in the fun.
This is very similar to Group, since there are multiple other individuals involved, however, this is exclusively other couples joining in and each of them having sex with one of you and your spouse.
No matter what you and your partner desire, you’re bound to find what you are looking for when you log onto Victoria Milan. Multidimensional searching takes the work out of finding the right lover by narrowing down your results to only the best options.
How to Suggest an Open Marriage
It’s okay to be curious about the possibilities an open marriage can offer you, and you’re not alone in thinking about it. If monogamous relationships aren’t enough for you but you still love your spouse, you’ll have to share this aspect of yourself with them eventually.
More married and dating couples are “Opening Up” to the idea of getting more out of their marriage by allowing sex on the side. If the marriage is true and they love you, they will warm up to the notion soon enough.
What do I mean by that? “We could have some fun trying this.”, “Could we talk about the possibility of an open marriage?”, or even “I would like you to try sleeping with another girl so you can show us what you learned.”
Avoid the Lingo.
There are a lot of terms that basically mean sleeping with multiple people, more or less. Rather than using terms such as swinging or open marriage, describe exactly what changes you’d have in mind for the relationship. Don’t leave these things up for interpretation.
Let Them Go First.
The easiest way to put their unease to rest is by offering them the chance to try their hand at casual dating for a while you sit back and enjoy hearing about their exciting encounters and supporting them through the experience. If they were feeling like this was your excuse to mess around with someone you’ve had a crush on, making things about them will put them at ease.
Communicate Now, Fuck Later.
Moving slowly and discussing the steps along the way will ensure no one us caught by surprise or left behind. Ensure your partner that they are who they want to be with, and saying yes now doesn’t mean you can’t slow things down or stop later on. This is about pleasure seeking, so if you two stop enjoying it at anypoint, call it quits!
Rework and Try Again.
Just like a monogamous relationship, Open Marriages are all different, change over time, and require adjusting. Even trying an Open Marriage in to begin with is about trying something slightly out of the norm that sounds like it might be more your style. If you find certain things don’t work, discuss what may work better and try differently next time.
On Victoria Milan you can set up an account with your profile and begin browsing interesting, nearby matches with your spouse. Let them know what you might be looking for or show them a lover they could be into.
Planning to Open Up
You and your spouse need to lay out detailed ground rules. And even once you’ve set out the schematics, you have to meet someone else who is not only cute but you can stand to talk to, before hoping they’ll be on board to set sail for your little rendezvous.
Above all, know that nothing you two decide is laid in stone. The best way to ensure everyone is happy is by keeping discussions open and frequent. Don’t leave any feelings buried, and encourage your spouse to be honest.
Discuss if and when you will tell eachother about perspective lovers. Some couples even go as far as to need their spouse’s approval to go ahead and bang it out.
Say exactly what it is you see the relationship looking like. What would change? What would stay the same? How often do you get together with your lovers? How many lovers will you have?
Plan for the worst. Accept that even if you try this exciting new kind of dating, it may leave you feeling less than pumped. If either of you test the waters and don’t like what you find, how will you two proceed?
Planning to open your marriage is the next biggest step after getting marriage. You know dating and married life are vastly more complex than being single ever was. Of course, you may have considered it already, but aren’t things going to get even more complicated adding someone new?
The answer is yes. Taking on more of anything whether it be hobbies, jobs, sex partners, or kittens, always means more work. You have convinced your spouse to give it a try, but there is still a long road ahead.
No matter what the two of you decide, your matches await on Victoria Milan. It takes just minutes to register with the site and then take as much time as you’d like browsing profiles for a little inspiration. Sexual adventure awaits when you open up a little.
The ability to adapt, communicate, and go with the flow are your best chances to mastering the art of Opening your Marriage, and Victoria Milan is your best chance to find the perfect match to help you two begin.