Sexless Marriages: Causes, Effects & How To Fix It

sexless marriages causes effects how to fix it

Sexless marriage has become a topic of interest in recent years, and it has also become a more common occurrence. Statistics show that 7 million Americans are, or have been, part of a sexless marriage.

The causes of sexless marriages can be complex, but the effects of these kinds of relationships can have devastating consequences. If you are in such a marriage, there are some reasons and effects. Continue reading our article to solve this situation and understand the reasons better.

what is a sexless marriage

What Is A Sexless Marriage?

There’s no single definition of a sexless marriage, but most research puts the number somewhere between 10 and 19 percent of married couples who have sex fewer than 10 times per year.

There are many reasons for a sexless marriage. It could be that one or both partners has lost interest in sex, which can happen for all sorts of reasons, such as stress, mental health issues, illness (physical or mental), or conflict in the relationship. It could be that one partner wants sex more than the other.

It can also be that a couple has fallen into a monotonous routine where they don’t think to make time for sex. Maybe they’re too busy focusing on their careers and children, or maybe their lives are just so full of distractions like TV and social media that they forget to connect with each other in other ways.

No matter what the cause, it’s important to realize that this is not normal for a healthy marriage and it can lead to some very negative things for your relationship if you don’t deal with it.

How Common Is A Sexless Marriage?

The most recent study on the subject, published in May in the Archives of Sexual Behavior, found that 15 percent of American adults surveyed in 2014 reported they hadn’t had sex in the past year. The researchers defined sexless marriage as one in which couples were intimate with each other less than 10 times a year, or about once a month.

The percentage is likely to be even higher for older couples. “Older adults are more likely to report engaging in sexual intercourse less than once per month,” say Dr. Brooke Feeney, professor at Carnegie Mellon University, who did not work on this study but has worked extensively on sexual desire and satisfaction among older adults.

Some estimates say that 20 percent of all marriages are sexless. While that figure is hard to verify — most people won’t admit their sex lives aren’t up to par — there’s no doubt that many marriages are sexless today. And just as with divorce rates and marriage rates, there are certain trends when it comes to the frequency of sex between married partners, especially if you’re looking at long-term marriages.

why do people have sexless marriages

Why Do People Have Sexless Marriages?: Causes of Sexless Marriages

Sexless marriages can be the result of numerous factors, including:

  • Loss of interest in spouse
  • Stress
  • Constant arguments at home
  • Pressure from financial problems
  • Physical and mental health problems
  • Time constraints due to work schedule, child care or other daily activities.

Regardless of the cause, sexless marriages can lead to marital frustration and resentment.

The Effects Of Being In A Sexless Marriage

No one ever imagines themselves in a sexless marriage. And yet, it’s a situation that happens way more often than we’d like to think.

The effects of being in a sexless marriage can be profound. It can lead to loss of interest, cheating, divorce, and more. Learn how to cope.

When you’re in a sexless marriage or relationship, you may feel pretty lonely. But the fact is that there are millions of people who are living the same life as you are experiencing. While this may not make you feel any better, it’s important to remember that there are many different reasons why a couple might stop having an active sexual relationship.

Here are the most common effects of being in a sexless marriage, according to experts:

  1. It can lead to loss of interest in your partner.
  2. Your mental health can suffer if you’re not having sex with your partner.
  3. A lack of sex could mean your partner is cheating on you.
  4. Your opinions may differ from your partner’s when it comes to being “sexless.”
  5. A lack of sex could be you projecting negativity onto your spouse for no reason (i.e., gaslighting).
  6. Being in a sexless marriage can make you feel lonely and unwanted.

How To Fix A Sexless Marriage?

If you are in a sexless marriage situation and want to resolve it, there are some things you need to do.

Talk to Your Spouse

First of all, you should talk about this situation with your spouse and understand your feelings for each other without arguing. When talking about this topic, stay away from arguments and just listen to the reasons. This is the best way for you to resolve the issue.


Review what you need to do in this regard, your partner’s and your wishes. Think about what you should and shouldn’t do. In conclusion, you both have things to do for a good married life. And these wishes are what are needed to move your relationship forward.

Make a Decision

Move forward by making some decisions about this issue. After reviewing your wishes with your partner, you need to put them into action. In this way, you will take the first steps for your marriage. And you can take your relationship to the next level again.

Start Having Sex Regularly

You can try to take small steps first so that you can experience the same excitement again. For example, you can set one day a week as a sex day. And try to do it regularly every week. On average, married couples have sex 2 or 3 times a week. You can reach this level as you wish. You can also try new fantasies to add excitement. For example, you can perform a more exciting sex ritual by doing fancy underwear or role-playing.

If Not, Get Professional Support

If you cannot solve your problem together, seek help from professional doctors. Professionals will help you take the right steps for your marital relationship. For this, you can apply to couples therapists or sex therapists. This way, you can get your relationship back on track.

how to fix a sexless marriage

FAQ About Sexless Marriage Effects

How Harmful Is Sexless Marriage?

Sexless Marriage can cause your marriage to end over time or your partner to cheat on you. In addition, this situation can create situations such as emotional collapse, depression, anxiety and stress. Therefore, if you are faced with such a situation, you should find a solution. You can visit our article to find a solution for Sexless Marriage.

Can a Sexless Marriage Relationship Survive?

Yes, it can, but as long as the issues are resolved. Sexless Marriage causes couples to become even more distant from each other over time. That’s why you have to come up with solutions and implement these solutions. Otherwise, your partner may cheat on you or your marriage may end in divorce.

Is Sexless Marriage Healthy?

Yes, if both couples are happy with this situation. But definitely not if the couples are not satisfied! Sexless Marriage can create situations such as depression, anxiety, emotional emptiness, stress and insecurity in people. As a result, people may cheat on their partners or want to separate from their spouses. For this reason, steps should be taken for a solution in Sexless Marriage.

Is It Right To Cheat While In Sexless Marriage?

Of course no! Cheating in marriage and taking advantage of such a situation will drag your relationship to a worse path. Therefore, instead of cheating on your spouse, prefer to help him or find a solution for your relationship. For this, you can visit our article.

What Causes Sexless Marriage?

libido difference




Health problems

Continuing arguments in marriage.

Posted by
Mertcan Yalcin

Mertcan is a bookworm who graduated from Beykent University. He likes to research and learn new things and for this he preferred the profession of copywriting. His area of expertise is quite diverse. He is highly specialized in relationships. And he has done quite a bit of research on this. His primary goal is to ensure that people are informed in every relationship and take the right steps.